Uh? Am I not allowed to apologize? I realize, in hindsight, that I did sound judgmental. D:
lmfao gurl it is such a non-apology i can’t even
As much as women are not at fault for looking like purely sexual beings to…
Okay…I am going to be totally honest here: I have trouble seeing how a woman taking a picture of herself (since this is clearly a webcam pic) with her boobs popped out is not her own fault. Comic or no comic.
How people react to such photos, including myself, are their own faults.
If I have internal misogynistic issues, however, I am willing to work through them as long as you try to be patient with me. There seems to be a lesson I need to learn from all this.
I expected something entirely different in that picture – like, actual cleavage. Which I define as partially exposed breasts. She looks completely covered. She just has boobs, that’s all. I’ve seen you post women with lower tops.
I wouldn’t call what you did “victim-blaming” because I reserve that for pretty serious victimization. But you did shame this woman for… having breasts. And you blame her for the misogyny that she no doubt deals with too. And you seemed to imply you didn’t think she was a real nerd (“I hope you read it cover to cover”) which has recently been discussed. And one of the points about fishing out “fake geek women” is accusing them of only doing it for male attention.
Even if she did take that picture to get attention from men – so what? How does that harm you? When guys turn around and value “hot” female nerds more than the non-hot female nerds… well, how is attacking women for male behavior going to do you any good? What if I decide I don’t like make-up, long hair, or low-cut tops? The majority of the pictures you post have girls and women with one or more of those characteristics. I have decided they are all tools of the patriarchy, who only look that way for men and now I will shame them, as well as this woman, who is just “too sexy to men” to actually read comics. Yeah, that won’t backfire at all – even though I like male attention, have long hair, and occasionally wear make-up and low cut tops. You see what I mean, right?
But I’ll be honest… I find nothing even close to what you’re saying about that picture. It’s one of poor quality and lighting, probably taken by a webcam, and I think that’s the reason her face is obscured but her boobs aren’t. And it’s a big book with a cool cover. A wider shot makes sense.
Anyway, I’m not offended, I’m not going to unfollow you. But I think your suspicion is misplaced and does not encourage more women to be open about reading comments. I think female sexuality and clothing is policed enough. I would be worried about potential participants of your blog being worried about their poses or their clothing and whether or not it’s “appropriate” – which would certainly hurt the honest portrayal of female comics fans that I have assumed you’re going for. It’s okay for women to be sexy, or want attention. But I don’t think she was even going for that.
You’re being pretty rational and clear about this, so that’s awesome.
But there is a bit of misundertanding here: I wanted to show the non-sexy side of comics with this blog because I feel like that’s the honest and normal side of comics. You don’t go to a comic book store with your chest popped out, right? (And by “popped out,” I mean “arching your back to make your boobs stand out more,” not “with your cleavage showing.”) So do pictures with a woman’s chest popped out belong on a blog that focuses on the non-sexy?
Is it wrong for me to discriminate here a bit to show the rest of the world that there’s this other side of comics that they usually don’t see? This is the question I am currently struggling with.
Meanwhile, I am trying to reconcile my feelings about the photo with not wanting to victim shame. (I am having problems seeing her as much of a victim beyond what I’ve said about her, unfortunately.)
“I wanted to show the non-sexy side of comics with this blog because I feel like that’s the honest and normal side of comics. “
Oh hey; how about shut the fuck up? Women who decide to dress in a way they find suitable but you dont, who like comics isn’t honest, or normal?